The Utah Curse

Today Breck had a big test. He wanted to get to get to school early, but couldn't find his truck keys. He looked in the normal places, like the key bowl and his pockets, and then the not-so-normal places, like the refrigerator and the bathroom.

Flummoxed, he retraced his steps... yesterday was Sunday so he hadn't left the house (that was me letting my mom know that we totally keep the Sabbath day holy), that meant the Saturday grocery trip was the last time he had driven anywhere. (Every time we bring our groceries in, it's the same routine; I load up with as many bags as I can, take the keys, and get up the stairs to open the door for him.) Breck opened the door, and jingle, jingle there hung the keys, right were I left them! We must have honest neighbors. Or no one wanted the truck with the Jabba the Hut hole punched in the side.
___________________________________________________________
It's official! Utah has cast it's curse. Let me explain.
Qualities of our first apartment in Utah:
1. It was in Provo, UT, AKA Mormon headquarters, USA.
2. It was always freezing no matter what the thermostat claimed.
3. It smelled weird so we had candles going 24/7.
4. It had no washer/dryer hook-up so we had go to the laundromat.
5. Something was wrong with the toilet so if you didn't flush it exactly right it would run.
6. Half the electrical outlets didn't work, so I always had to blow dry my hair in the kitchen.

Things that happened in our apartment just this weekend:
1. It was General Conference, so we felt super Mormony.
2. It dropped a good 20 degrees overnight while all our windows were open.
3. Something died somewhere and made our apartment smell awful, so we had a trip to BBB for some Yankee Candle Company goodness (Someone explain to me how our wedding gift card to that place STILL has money on it!) 4. The heating unit in out dryer broke so we had to go to the laundromat.
5. Our toilet handle broke off (WHAT?) and so if you don't lift and press at the right time, it just runs.
6. The top outlets in our room stopped working.

All in ONE weekend. Utah is flipping me off so hard right now.

___________________________________________________________ Also, I just finished a book called Room.

It's a story told from the point of view of Jack, a 5-year-old who has spent his entire life in an 11 X 11 room, never once seeing the outside world. His mother was kidnapped and kept in this room for 2 years before she became pregnant and had her captors child. It is nuts. I recommend it, but don't listen to the audio tape, the person that reads it does it as if they were a 5-year-old. Not so desirable.

Snippets

This week I won a 10 month long battle. Breck let me "groom" his eyebrows. Yes I might of been on a timer and only accomplished half of what needed to be done... but I WON! Right after I finished, Breck grabbed a handful of napkins and pressed them to forehead. He really thought he was bleeding! And girls can't take pain... psh.

You know what I love? Waking up everyday and remembering I don't have homework! Ever again! That fact never gets less awesome.

So with my free evenings, I've caught up on Gossip Girl:

Chuck and Blair FOREVER!!!

Been on rainy runs with my man:

Our 5K in Arkansas is in a month. If we can both finish in our goal times, we get to buy new running shoes. I thinking about these babies:

I've been working on my handwriting:

And making yummy midnight snacks like this Reeses Banana Bread:

And Cinnabon Cinnamon Rolls!

Cinnabon Cinnamon Rolls
1 pack of active dry yeast
1 cup of warm milk (105 to 110 F)
1/2 cup sugar
1/3 cup margarine, melted
1 tsp salt
2 eggs
4 cups flour
1 cup brown sugar
2 1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/3 cup margarine, softened
8 Tbsp margarine, softened
1 1/2 cups powdered sugar
1/4 cup cream cheese
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1/8 tsp salt

1. Dissolve the yeast in the warm milk in a large bowl.
2. Add the sugar, margarine, salt, eggs, and flour. Mix well. Knead the dough into a large bowl (I added another 1/2 cup of flour because it was too sticky) Put in a bowl, cover, and let rise in a warm place for about an hour.
3. Roll the dough out on a lightly floured surface. Roll flat until it is approximately 21 inches long and 16 inches wide.
4. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
5. Combine brown sugar and cinnamon in a bowl. Spread 1/3 cup softened margarine evenly over the surface of the dough and then sprinkle the cinnamon and sugar on top.
6. Roll up the dough tightly and then cut the rolled dough into 1 3/4 inch slices.
7. Place on a slightly greased pan 2 inches apart. Bake for 15-20 minutes or until lightly brown on top.
8. While the rolls are baking, combine the icing ingredients. Beat 8 Tbsp margarine. powdered sugar, cream cheese, vanilla extract and salt well with a mixer until fluffy.
9. When rolls come out of the oven , coat each generously with the icing.
EAT AND ENJOY!!!

LIFE IS GOOD!

A Casual Review

As promised, I will be doing a little review on JK Rowlings new book A Casual Vacancy.

If you are a Potter Fan, let me tell you now: the wizards never show up. I was crossing my fingers for a cold breeze of Dementors, an unexplained owl, maybe even a passerby in a strange robe. Don't hold your breath, this lot is just a bunch of muggles.

In the first 50 or so pages, you have a pretty good idea of what the main thread of the story is going to cover; in the lovely village of Pagford a man on the town council dies just before an important vote. As the opposing parties are scramble to find someone to fill the spot, ugly secrets bubble to the surface and burst over the unsuspecting citizens. So 50 pages in, your pretty much saying to yourself:
1. How does this go on for 450 more pages?
2. I already deal with enough politics on Facebook.
3. I need an English slang dictionary.

To be honest, I don't think most of you would like this book. I wouldn't recommend it to a stranger. But I am so glad I read it. Once you let go of your preconceived notions of what this book should be, it's beautiful in its tangled simplicity. This is a story about a group of average people. No one is the hero, the admirable characters have vices and the demons have redeeming qualities (except Simon, we can all hate Simon). It's tragic and triumphant and messy and cleansing, a microcosm of the things we hide beneath our perfectly crafted lives. JK lived up to my expectations of intricate character sculpting, and surpassed them with a flawless passing narrative that shows a singular dedication to her craft. This is Rowling material, but if you are looking for Hogwarts Returns, this not the place to find it.

*I should add that JKs dip into adult literature was very adult. (Mom, I promise I closed my eyes through the bad parts.)

Just in case you were wondering, I did create a small key:
ring off = hang up
pet hates = pet peeves
surgery = doctors office
roaches = roll up cigarettes
nibbles = finger food
lezzer = lesbian
redundant = fired
theater = surgery
And "Arf" is an appropriate nickname for "Arthur" because the Brits in Pagford would pronounce it "Arfer."

UPDATE: I just listened to a BBC interview with Rowling where she says she has two more children's books already developed! The tease.

Be my Blog Friend?

So I did a mini blog makeover! There are some new tabs at the top that you might find fun to peruse, but most importantly, I finally added a "Join this Site" button. So if you want, you can delight my ego and follow me! I am always looking for new blogs to read so there is a 100% chance I'll follow you back. Unless you're a cat person.

Kidding.

Mostly.

I completed my Menu Board!

And I made it a little friend:

Painting chevron is NOT as bad as I thought it would be... unless, like me, you do it once, and hate the colors you picked and have to start over:

Breck still says it looks like a giant easter egg.

Anyway... I joined a book club!

I'm the only person there that is younger than 40, makes less than $100,000 a year, and isn't blatantly racist, but it makes for awesome politically incorrect entertainment. Like this little nugget: "Her name is Dantavious. I don't even need to open my eyes to know what color she is."
YIKES

Breaking news! My husband just make me this:

Obviously, inhaling this as quickly as possible is much more important than anything in the world.

Toodle-loo!

Kitchen Makeover

It was one of those mornings. I swear I dressed in the same clothes, put on the same makeup, did my hair the same way, but it definitely did not turn out the way it is normally does. Am I the only one this happens to? Anyway, I got a bit panicky and then when I saw that the little baby panda from the National Zoo died today, I climbed back into bed and declared it was a national day of mourning.

I really am sad about the panda. I tried to find a picture to go with this, but when you type "baby panda" into Google, it's really hard to tell which ones are stuffed animals and which ones are real. That cute.

On to the fun stuff! Breck and I are redoing our kitchen decor! And that means projects for me!

My new menu chalkboard was inspired by these wonderful things I found/fell in love with from Anthro:

I tried to take step-by-step pictures but I kept on getting excited and forgetting to stop so...
Before:

During:

After:

They were all out of chalk at Hobby Lobby so I haven't been able to use it yet, but I'll update in a few days when I finish my giant chevron clock!

Survivor Casting Calls

Mini Rant:
Coach purses. How did they become popular? I understand spending money on classic, quality items, but am I the only one that thinks this brown on brown repeating pattern is just about the ugliest thing to become widely excepted?

I know they change the style and colors occasionally, but who was the first person that said, "OMG! I totally need this brown C all over this lumpy bag! I'm going to pay my college tuition to buy it and so should you!" I hate that person, whoever it is.

Anyway.
Yesterday I checked quite the doozy of my life-long bucket list. I applied for SURVIVOR!

If you didn't know... I'm a HUGE Survivor fan. As in I haven't missed an episode since the 4th grade. That right there is Harry Potter level dedication. I've filled out the application a couple of times before, but I've never been in a place where I could drop off the face of the planet for a month. Now that I'm married and it's football season... no one will notice :)

After a four hour road trip to Oklahoma, a friend and I pulled into the magnificent pile of dirt that is Hinton, OK. The Casting Call for the show was to take place in "Sugar Creek Casino" so I was expecting you know, lights, or... a casino. It was kind of like that, but in a "I just upgraded from living in a trailer" sort of way.

Anyways, if you ignored the smoke and the hoards of drunk people, it was a fabulous crowd! About 200 people (of ALL sorts) showed up for the interview. We stood behind this AWESOME survival buff who spent a good ten minutes teaching us how to catch fish using a stick.

We waited in line for about an hour, exchanging snippets of information and strategy with the people around us, signed a couple of waivers and got a number. Obviously, I was lucky 100. Based on your number, they called you into a back room where you stood in front of blinding lights and a camera, and had 60 seconds to explain why you would be a good candidate for the show.

My 60 seconds were kind of a blur. I started well and ended strong, but there might of been some crazy eyes and strange gestures in the middle part: If they like it, perfect, I'll take the million dollars. If not, I'm happy I went! You won't score unless you take the shot, right? And maybe the crazy lady with no teeth will get on the show and I'll be able to say that I complimented her hat in casting. Win, win.

My Man's Mistress

I have a very interesting visitor in my home. I knew when she was coming, and how long she would stay... but I didn't quite understand how exhausting her company would be. She ALWAYS wants attention... Monday Night, Thursday Night, Friday Night and ALL day Saturday and Sunday!
Yes, Football has returned. Now you might be thinking, "What? Football is the full package! How can you not like her!??!" It's not that I don't! I just can only take her in small doses. Like babies.

It's only been a couple of weeks, but I've already burned through 3 more shows on my blessed Netflix subscription. It's time for a new hobby while she continues her visit. That is why I've decided to open an online Etsy shop. Etsy is a place where people actually do the things you see on Pinterest and sell the stuff they make. The question I have for you is what should I create an inventory of?

I could do something with my photoshop/design background, like this art print:

or invitations:

I could do something with my handwriting, like calligraphy:

or favors:

I could do something a little more crafty for the home, wreaths:

maps/wall art:

or knickknacks:

I could do party/wedding decor:

And of course, I can do custom shoes:

PLEASE HELP! I know I want to concentrate on just one or two things, but what? Opinions?

P.S. I should probably mention that besides the shoes, these pictures are not mine! I've done variations on all of these products for my own home/wedding but my camera doesn't have that kind of quality.